Hey There!

Sorry I've been neglecting you, when you've been so loyal to me. I'll try to be better. Thing is, I'm writing a book, and I've discovered that it takes up a lot of time. Time spent doing nothing. And being a parent, even a lousy one, takes up even more time. Then there's working at the kids' school and trying to help with laundry and this whole restaurant running gig. But I'll make an effort to improve, and I'll be careful not to post anything that's going to make it into the book, 'cause there's probably some intellectual property thing, and anyway, if I post it here you'll have no incentive to download me on your Kindle.

Five Minutes and Counting

Later this month I'll be at the Museum of Science for its Let's Talk About Food festival. It's sponsored in part by MathWorks, who are, as I'm sure many of you locals know, makers of MATLAB and Simulink Technical Computing Software. Who just heard Robin Young? I did. Anyway, apparently there's some kind of sciencey, foody thing taking place, and I'm happy to be part of it. 

My challenge (and the same went out to my estimable colleagues) is to prepare what, in the industry, we call a "dish," and as is my curse, you all look to me for steak. So thank you (not!) Mark Bittman for stealing my bulgogi thunder in the NYT magazine, but you'll like mine, so toss the Times and pay attention to me. (BTW, 110-Across was Pam Dawber - remember her?) Now, I don't know what the MoS was thinking, having me do this thing without even the help of a microwave (odd considering the sciencey nature of microwaves), 'cause I'm pretty sure the frozen burritos from Costco take about 3 minutes if you don't forget to turn them halfway through.

Wait - this just in! I get to use induction! Like how Bob Seger never got an induction into the Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame. What kind of bullshit is that?!? And I'm not even a fan, but c'mon, the guy's a legend. Tom Cruise in his underwear, that Ralph Bakshi film from the eighties- oh, the images! But I digress.

So back to the bulgogi, which are going to be delicious, and I'm going to somehow induct them and serve them to you if you show up for this really important event, because without science, we would have had an extra study hall, and who really wants that? Oh, and these are the two sauce recipes, one of which requires electricity and centrifugal force and probably some other stuff. Also, both undergo emulsification, or at least suspension.

Thai-Style Chimichurri

1 cup vegetable oil

½ cup rice wine vinegar

½ cup coconut milk
juice of 3 limes

1 Tbsp local honey

2 cups chopped cilantro

1 cup chopped mint

1 bunch basil, rough chopped

¼ cup chopped scallions

5 ea Thai bird chiles

3 cloves garlic

1 Tbsp salt

1 tsp grated ginger

- combine all ingredients in a blender and puree until smooth.

Super Simple Inauthentic Korean BBQ Sauce

1 cup organic ketchup

1 cup soy sauce (or tamari for gluten-free)

¾ cup mustard oil (available at south Asian markets)

1 Tbsp local honey

- whisk to combine

Grass Fed Beef

What do you see here? I see cattle in a pasture, going about their business of eating all day. That's what cattle do. They eat. Sometimes they eat grass, sometimes grain, often they eat vomit. These photos are promotional photos for a grass fed/finished beef operation. And while I have no need to doubt that these are its actual cattle, I would point out one fact nobody seems to realize. All the cattle pictured above are eating grain, not grass. These are grain fields. Well, they're both really. Grains are mature grasses. Let your lawn grow up and you have a grain lawn. So when I go to the nearest luxury organic megamarket and see grass-fed beef from Missouri, nicely marbled up like choice beef, then I know that the cattle ate mature grasses - only way it could happen. And contrary to what many grass feeding advocates will tell you, the cattle survived just fine without any antibiotics on what looks to me like a pure grain diet.

Turkey Brine for Thanksgiving (& Good for Pork, Too)

You three followers of mine (one of whom I don't even know) have been so loyal that it just feels right to return the love. With Thanksgiving just around the corner, I thought I'd share this recipe for a turkey brine that'll knock that bird outta da park. You do brine your turkeys, don't you? 'Cause if you don't, Alton Brown will pee in your coffee.

Now, if you know me at all, and two-thirds of you apparently do, you'd know the importance of style and design to my day to day life. That's why I chose a particularly handsome Microsoft-designed template to present you with this recipe. Enjoy, and bon appetit.

I forgot to mention that you should divide this by five for best results. That shouldn't be too hard, right? I mean, I would've, but I had other things to do.

Addendum to Post about the G23 from 11.08.2010

Congratulations to my sous chefs for landing in the pages of Stuff Magazine  - a wholly deserved recognition with quite the handsome photos as well. And thank you, Mark, for at least having one nice thing to say about me. Ted told me that they had edited his compliment out of the piece, but he forgot he emailed me all of his interview answers and I then forwarded them to Ruth, so that was clearly a lie. But enough of that. For now. Anyway, the piece reminded me of something I forgot in the earlier blog post: the need for clear and open communication.

1/2. Communication

In the frozen tundra of my Canadian youth, we had a unique way of coexistence with our fellow socialists and cops on horses. We found that essential to our all just getting along (something for which Canadians are well known) were the quaint notions of politeness and humility. I believe you here in the States call it "passive aggressiveness." Or at least that's what my wife says. And it is distinctly that politeness and humility that enables me to deliver important information to my management team. Using a carefully contrived system (see earlier post for more on systems) of communiqués, I am able to disseminate my needs and wishes to my staff in a much more thought out and appropriate manner than actually speaking to them in person. One such memorandum heads this post. Obviously it is only the title page, and I felt the need to redact much of what appeared in the original document to protect important trade secrets. You'll notice that, to be fair to Mark and Ted, I prepare such communiqués in French and Spanish as well - Spanish due to Mark's Filipino ancestry, and French because Ted worked in Luxembourg once and I remember it being near France. Also, by delivering my thoughts via electronic mail, it becomes a "green" message. Whether the recipients choose to print these words of wisdom, thereby destroying the planet for my two children, is up to them.

A Day in the Life, Part Something - How We Roll at the G23: A Really Serious, Introspective and Thought Provoking Photo Essay for Pulitzer Consideration

Sometimes people approach me, a little guardedly, at first, as meeting me can be an intimidating experience - like meeting Bono, or the president of the moon - and they'll say something like "I heard about your blog at the recent Mensa convention," or "I ran into Noam at Starbucks the other day, and he looked particularly  delighted with his laptop, and I thought he must really dig the free WiFi, but then I saw he was taking notes, and lo and behold, he was reading your blog." This happens rather frequently, really, and when it does, I invariably get the same request.: would you mind very much posting some photos from a typical day at your establishment, sir, please and thank you? So here I am, throwing caution to the wind and letting the world in on our own little love boat, the SS Grill 23 & Bar. I'l be your captain, and tonight, you're dining with me.

1. Discipline

This is Mark, normally my invaluable right hand man, but today he had some behavioral issues and I felt the need to place him in a time-out. I know, I know - that seems excessive, but sometimes I need to rule with an iron fist. Here he is in our chicken wire time-out cage. Hopefully he'll regret his aberrant behavior and apologize. Then he can join us for supper.

2. Supper

Speaking of... Thanks, Carlos, for this delicious New England Boiled Dinner. Why, this sure warranted you clocking in a half hour early.

Who knew the Saveur Art Director would stop by to frame a shot. I must have misplaced my tarnished antique silver flatware.

3. The Team
As you might imagine, navigating a ship like ours through this ocean of bad metaphors requires quite a special team of sailors, and I count my lucky stars each and every day.

There's Mark, again, proudly displaying a bottle of fish sauce. Of Filipino descent, Mark keeps this bottle on hand for personal consumption.

That's Ted. A while back I set out to become Ted, and I bought some hoodies at REI and a snowboarding jacket on sale in Wakefield. I'm not sure it worked, though.

This is Adelino. He's quit and come back so many times, it's not even really worth joking about anymore. Adelino has an obsession with the phallus. Also, I helped to cook for his daughter's 15th birthday, which was a real honor.

And here's Lori. She wanted me to take her picture, so I did. You can thank me later, Lori.

4. The Systems, the Space and Other Stuff
I had more trouble with this heading. The others came to me easily, but for some reason, the words weren't flowing this time.

This falls under the systems part. By systems I mean how we organize stuff. As you can probably imagine it's vital to the success of our mission here to have very efficient and specific systems in place. Systems are really, well, they're very, well, um, well, systematic, really. Here is an example of a system: a future menu and accompanying new item preplist. I try to get these up every Wednesday or Thursday. I use masking tape for hanging and No 2 pencil for additional notes. The new items are circled.

Another example of a system: the daily preplist. If you see your name, you have work to do. Which brings me to yet another crucial system we have in place: recipes. Sometimes recipes explain how to make things out of food.  Here are 2 I found online:

Here I am inserting some text to better segue into the next couple shots . They'll comprise the space and other stuff the earlier heading references.

This is the dry-aging room. We weigh (note: system) everything, date it and let it hang out here for a few weeks before we serve it to you. It's where science meets poetry. Lines like that one, incidentally, have the chicks chasing me around the block.

This is the oil shelf.

5. Royalty-free Desktop Wallpapers

 bird chiles

 jimmy nardello peppers

 braised cabbage

 various cauliflowers

maki of shrimp and crab

You're welcome.

6. Food from Saturday Night

 lightly torched yellowtail, "nuacamole," black cumin, bird chile sambal aioli, orange powder, olive oil, smoked sea salt, baby ice plant

 berkshire pork belly, spicy beet mustard, cauliflower pickle, braised red cabbage, brown butter-caraway crumble, celery greens

 epic.pot.roast: beef cheek confit, local vegetables and potatoes, mushroom infused bordelaise (note the flying droplet that casts a shadow)

 peppered flatiron, patatas bravas, tomato and garlic aliolis, fried shishito peppers, cracked olives

scallops, compressed pickled apple beurre blanc, parsnip chips, brussels sprouts, macomber turnip puree

7. The End

This is how our kitchen staff celebrated Luis' and Gloria's departure. Pretty darn delicious. Anyway, thanks for coming. It's been my pleasure showing you around. Please watch your step when disembarking, and don't forget to tip your server. 

Montreal Steak Seasoning, eh?

So this guy comes in and demands Montreal steak seasoning. Really? I've been here schlepping steaks for more than twelve years, and while we get far too many requests for some abominable steak sauce (to which I'm always compelled to aquiesce), I've never once had the need to keep a jar of Montreal steak seasoning in the back. Now, one might see this request as a nod to my own Canadian heritage - indeed, je viens de Montreal, a aussi. However, I'm fairly certain, without consulting Google, that the same does not apply to that namesake steak seasoning. Anyhow, that said, I did need to concoct some sort of "rub" as a giveaway for our James Beard Dinner, and time's growing short, so here goes:

Montreal Steak Seasoning as Interpreted by One Who Once Called Montreal Home

1/2 cup Maldon sea salt flakes
2 Tbsp pimenton dulce de la vera
2 Tbsp toasted onion
1 Tbsp toasted garlic
1 Tbsp dill pollen
1 tsp white peppercorns
1 tsp black peppercorns
1 tsp lovage seeds
1 tsp coconut sugar

- thoroughly grind all ingredients